A long time ago in a world far far away we did a lot of camping. We and our friends had little kids and were feeling cramped by them, all our "fun sports" and competitions were kinda' on hold.
And we're competitors all.....
bummer.
One day somebody broke out a croquet set in the campground........ we read the rules and thought "hey, this might could be fun!"
It was.....
Now croquet is gener'ly considered a genteel sport, a sport to be played with the pinky finger OUT just so.... or so we thought. Turns out croquet can get perty rowdy and competitive, especially the part about "sending" the opponents balls out of the court by stepping on your ball and whacking your opponents ball out of site. So we kinda' got into it for a while, went through probably twenty-thirty sets of clubs and balls.... moving up the food chain into higher end stuff, custom balls, lathe turned AL and bound head mallets, full-blown competition grade stuff. In fact, we got so into it that we figgered HEY! let's find out if there are tournaments and stuff!
There was.......
But we had trepidations...... we're competitors remember? No whining.
So's we checked in with the "clubs" and asked the right questions. "Do we need to dress for this?"
"But of COURSE not old chap, just come in your street clothes, we LOVE new blood....... SILLY idea that...."
And what about 'sending' opponents?? I mean it's in the rules, but it's "mean...isn't it?"
"MEAN???....... 'Sending' your opponents is part of the game Old Bean!! If you cawn't stawnd being ejected into the next county then you must stay home!"..... "Why, our best sender, Berthold Lendershank III has been known to send folks off on QUESTS with his powerful shots! If you ha'ven't been 'sent' by our Bertie you haven't been SENT!!"
really.......
So we so'igned up for competition.......
And we learned that there IS a propuh' way to dress......
And that while sending is "allowed" by the rules it isn't meant to be a part of your STRATEGY....... "Good LO'RD MAN!! AGAIN?? It just isn't DONE that way...."
"Just because a thing is in the Rule Book doesn't make it PROPER!"
And we learned that winning is just SOOOooo improper until you've paid your Good Ol' Boy dues and learned to talk right........ and learned the unspoken rules.
But we did thoroughly kick all ass until we were asked to leave.
And never broke or bent a single rule.
musta' been an etiquette thing.
Oddly enough, the concept of 'revenge' didn't once come up in the World of Competitive Croquet......
al