we need a humor forum.....until then

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A husband on his deathbed requested to his wife that he be buried in his favorite brown suit. She visited the morgue to make sure this was the case. There she found out that her husband was wearing a blue suit and the body next to him was wearing the brown suit. She threw a fit and the mortician said "Come back in 10 minutes and this will be fixed." She returned in 10 minutes and found her husband in the brown suit and the other body in the blue suit. She said "How did you switch the suits on the bodies so fast?" The mortician said " Naw. We just switched the heads."
 
How to get to Heaven from Ireland.

A true Story from an Irish Sunday School Teacher.

I was testing children in my Dublin Sunday school class to see if they understood the concept of getting to heaven.

I asked them, 'If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale and gave all my money to the church, would that get me into heaven?' 'NO!' the children answered.

'If I cleaned the church every day, mowed the garden, and kept everything tidy, would that get me into heaven?' Again, the answer was 'NO!'

'If I gave sweets to all the children, and loved my husband, would that get me into heaven?' Again, they all answered 'NO!'

I was just bursting with pride for them. I continued, 'Then how can I get into heaven?'

A little boy shouted out: 'YUV GOTTA BE FOOKN' DEAD.

It's a curious race, the Irish. Brings a tear to the eye, doesn't it.
 
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