Tim Oltersdorf
Active member
Texas benchrest shooter Tim Oltersdorf accidentally triggered the development of a black hole in his new garage after a recent move. His wife Teresa describes the series of events that led to the tragedy: "After our recent move we were sitting on the world's largest collection of empty cardboard boxes. I had Tim jump on it and roll around to compress it into a more manageable size. After his recent weight gain I underestimated the force generated by his mass. His body exerted so much pressure that it compressed the cardboard into such a small volume that it triggered the development of a small black hole which immediately began to swallow all of the surrounding stuff we had accumulated in the 35 years we lived in our last house. It got our china plate collection celebrating Elvis Presley"s greatest hits, the large doe-eyed children paintings, all of the Beany babies, the Franklin mint commemorative spoons and, worse of all, Tim's ceramic centipede statues including the one rearing up before a terrified half naked women. That darn near broke Tim's heart. We were saved when it tried to ingest Tim's pile of benchrest t-shirts. That clogged it up faster then a giant turd in a low flow, water saver toilet. It shuttered, wheezed and died. Thank you benchrest! You saved us and possibly the planet."
